Today I have a fabulous A-Z of Christmas guest post from the wonderful Nikki from Stressy Mummy. A mum to four, writer, blogger, teacher, wife and self confessed drinker of too much tea – Not always in that order!
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A is for awful presents
Yes, yes the whole giving of gifts is a wonderful thing and all but let’s face it, you always get at least one somewhat unexpected gift that makes you take a deep intake of breath. I have had a few from my mother in law over the years; hideous jumpers, knickers that are three sizes too small. Maybe she is trying to tell me something.
B is for Baileys
Ah yes the age old Christmas tradition that mummy has to consume a whole bottle of Baileys over the course of Christmas Day and Boxing Day. It is the law.
C is for crackers
I do like crackers but I have a few issues to take up with them. Firstly, why do they put what is on them on the back? I have never understood that. Have they not heard of the element of surprise? They are also extremely expensive, I looked at some that were between £20 -£30!! That is extortionate. I would expect gold plated gifts inside for that sort of money. My final gripe about crackers is the size of the hats. It is traditional that everyone around the table wears the festive party hats except that I can’t as I have a huge head and mine always rips. How about accommodating the larger head?
D is for dates
I never buy dates, I’m not even sure that I like them, they are very ugly to look at and have a strange texture, but my mum always bought them when I was young and there they all are looking nice and festive. They seem to always jump into my Christmas shopping trolley.
E is for Easter eggs
While we are scurrying around the supermarket aisles picking up those last minute essentials, the supermarket staff are scurrying around out the back with Easter eggs ready to go out on Boxing day.
F is for food
Tons of the stuff. I buy so much food at Christmas I often wonder were the other twenty people are. I can’t help it.
G is for gin
By about lunchtime on Christmas day, I could do with a bottle or two just to help me get through the day.
H is for hangover
A whole day of drinking wine is not a good thing. Well not the next day anyway.
I is for in a minute…
When every new present has to be removed from the box (which these days can take several hours and a whole arsenal of tools), food to be cooked, mess to be cleared and children to be demanding, in a minute is my phrase of the day.
J is for Jesus
Who is he again? Oh yes he is the person whose birthday we are celebrating. My daughter actually thinks that Christmas day is Father Christmas’s birthday.
K is for kiss
We always had mistletoe in the house, it was a bit of a family tradition carried on from my grandparent’s who loved mistletoe. One Christmas we all started having an allergic reaction to something and the doctor concluded
that it was caused either by the real Christmas tree or the mistletoe. So now we don’t have either in the house and there is no more kissing!
L is for list
I don’t know about checking it twice, I could do with checking my children’s lists on a daily basis and then buying their presents on Christmas Eve as I can guarantee that they have changed their minds after I have bough their presents.
M is for money
“Tis the season to spend money” I dread to think how much I spend on Christmas. I never add it up afterwards as I think it would scare me too much.
N is for nuts
I was explaining to my children that in the olden days, children had lovely things like nuts and oranges in their stocking and they looked at me like I was some sort of alien. Why would anyone want nuts? They are not fans it would seem, I might just put a few in this year to make the point.
O is for overdraft
Enough said.
P is for pigs in blankets
For some bizarre reason, the children are obsessed with these little bacon wrapped sausages and apparently they are the highlight of Christmas dinner. Maybe I should abandon the whole turkey thing and just do pigs in blankets and chips, much easier.
Q is for queen
Does anyone watch the Queen’s speech anymore? I can’t remember the last time I had time to sit down and watch it. Did I miss anything?
R is for recycling
At this wonderful time of the year, we could do with about twelve recycling bins. Boxes, wrapping paper, more boxes it is never ending and usually results in me jumping up and down in the recycling bins to try and squash everything down flat to make room for some more.
S is for stuffing
Christmas is all about stuffing; stuffing bags of shopping into small spaces so that the children can’t find them, stuffing too many gifts into the children’s stockings, stuffing the turkey, stuffing our faces. It really is a stuffing time of year.
T is for tinsel
Or not as the case is in this house. I hate the stuff, it sits there shimmering and shaking and I can not stand it. Maybe I have one of those random phobias. I have had to buy the odd bit over the last few years for the children but I have beads on my tree instead of tinsel, much nicer.
U is for unprepared
It doesn’t matter how much shopping I do and how many presents I have bought, I always feel unprepared.
V is for Vicks
I always add a large tub of Vicks to my Christmas shopping as there is always at least one child with a cold over Christmas, it is all part of the festive fun.
X is for x-ray
We seem to always manage to have at least one child x-rayed over the Christmas period. One year it was a small magnet up the nose. Another a run over foot. Everyone needs a festive trip to A&E don’t they?
Y is for Yule
It’s a funny word isn’t it apparently like many words that we use at this time of year, it actually doesn’t have anything to do with Christmas and is a Pagan word for a pre-Christian Norse festival.
Z is for zzzzzz
It is just all too tiring.
I’m nodding along to most of these, thank you for sharing your A-Z of Christmas with us – Merry Christmas
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